10 Things About Me in KC

1. Last week I was in Kansas City. I didn't get the schedule until well after I got there, so I couldn't plan out any visits after work was done. It was unfortunate because I wanted to see several of my friends and my chiropractor, too.

I know mentioning my chiropractor is completely random, but it's how I roll. Little known fact: spinal alignment is crucial to proper rolling.

2. Instead, I saw the gym. I did need to see the gym, but I would have rather seen my friends and a pomegranate martini.

3. At the gym, I found to my surprise that after months of not running, I'm still able to run more than a mile without my lungs imploding. That was good to know. It will come in handy in case I ever encounter a Tyrannosaurus Rex.

4. Every business meeting that I attend in Kansas City results in a blizzard. Yet, ironically, every business meeting that I attend in Kansas City does not result in barbeque. Therefore, we can deduct, that blizzards do not result in barbeque.

5. I reasoned that since I had been to the gym and I was snowed in for my last night at the meeting, that I would ring up room service and order the dessert that I had missed all year long--the fried cheesecake with raspberry drizzle. They told me that the fried cheesecake had been discontinued. I cried "You're all bastard people!" hung up, and bit my pillow. Then I called again and ordered a salad using a different voice.

I think the universe is trying to tell me that my butt is too big.

6. I did finally get my fill of sushi, though, at Nara in downtown KC. It. Was. Heaven. If I ever have kids, I might have to name them Ginger and Wasabi.

I guess it's a good thing I will probably never have kids.

7. Despite all this talk of food, eating of food, disappointment surrounding food, and generalized blogging about food, I did manage to still lose 2 more pounds this week. That makes me the shizzzz....

8. I'm going to geek out on you all right now and admit I have no idea what "the shizz" even means. I heard it used once and I hope I used it correctly. I assume it means "a person viewed in the most favorable light." But, it could have just been someone sneezing for all I know.

9. Maybe "the shizz" is what happens if you sneeze with a full bladder. If that's the case, then I'm not the shizz. I take it back.

10. I about didn't make it out of Kansas City alive. I was creeping along, watching people wreck right in front of me, trying my best to escape the blizzard with all limbs intact, when right behind me a snow plow blared his horn. If there's anything that will make you lose the shizz, that would be it.

Peace out,